Received: from evaki.its.uow.edu.au (130.130.68.32) by staffmail.uow.edu.au (10.5.102.13) with Microsoft SMTP Server id 8.1.336.0; Sun, 4 Jan 2009 09:38:54 +1100 Received: from febris-nat.its.uow.edu.au ([130.130.68.210] helo=febris.its.uow.edu.au) by evaki.its.uow.edu.au with esmtp (Exim 4.69) (envelope-from ) id 1LJF8w-00051X-Cs for blane@uow.edu.au; Sun, 04 Jan 2009 09:38:54 +1100 Received: from c3.confirmedcc.com (c3.confirmedcc.com [64.95.77.164]) by febris.its.uow.edu.au (MOS 3.10.3-GA) with ESMTP id QGQ57789; Sun, 4 Jan 2009 09:38:49 +1100 (EST) Received: from p2-ws508.ad.prodcc.net (unknown [10.252.0.101]) by c3.confirmedcc.com (Postfix) with ESMTP id 41EAC186073E for ; Sat, 3 Jan 2009 17:20:37 -0500 (EST) From: Fatherhood Foundation To: Brian Lane Date: Sun, 4 Jan 2009 09:22:11 +1100 Subject: Legacy of Love Thread-Topic: Legacy of Love Thread-Index: Aclt9A8ySalxnl9YQiSAcbR3Zadvlg== Message-ID: <1102386838077.1101938345415.1211.8.115172019@scheduler> List-Unsubscribe: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?p=un&v=001jm8CFGIzLJHYg-gJRLc-3d90mBLDU8ykFIL8-Y27VNRZ6nDgWWACAg== Reply-To: "info@fathersonline.org" Accept-Language: en-AU, en-US Content-Language: en-US X-MS-Exchange-Organization-AuthAs: Anonymous X-MS-Exchange-Organization-AuthSource: excasht03.ad.uow.edu.au X-MS-Has-Attach: X-MS-TNEF-Correlator: x-junkmail-status: score=10/49, host=febris.its.uow.edu.au x-junkmail-sd-raw: score=unknown, refid=str=0001.0A150204.495FE8FE.003A:SCFMA772204,ss=1,fgs=0, ip=64.95.77.164, so=2008-09-22 23:22:13, dmn=5.4.3/2007-10-18, mode=single engine x-junkmail-iwf: false x-return-path-hint: ESC1102386838077_1101938345415_1211@in.confirmedcc.com x-roving-id: 1101938345415.1211 x-lumos-senderid: 1101938345415 x-roving-campaignid: 1102386838077 x-roving-streamid: 0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="_000_1102386838077110193834541512118115172019scheduler_" MIME-Version: 1.0 --_000_1102386838077110193834541512118115172019scheduler_ Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/526.gif?a=3D1= 102386838077] 5th January 2009 Inspiring Fathers Encouraging Families Issue 333 [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/stock1/3m9q9k8q.jpg] Legacy of Love Dear Brian, Welcome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information servi= ce for Fathers and Families as we present a Legacy of Love In This Issue Frontline...The first year of the rest of your life Link...Marley & Me Laughter..I want what she's got Grandfathers...Appreciate every moment Single Dads...Happy New Year All You Need is Love..Wholesome viewing Special Feature...The Natural Family News & Info..New Year News Dad's Prayer..Help me leave a legacy Next Week A Father's Love [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/s.gif] Join our Mailing List! [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/ftf_btn_1.gif] Quick Links Fatherhood Foundation Dads in Distress Men to Men Malachi Global Choicez.com Beyond Blue Australian Family Association Fathers & Daughters Raising Children Network (Aus) CSA Adverts [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/542.jpg?a=3D1= 102386838077] Thought of the Week [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/561.jpg?a=3D1= 102386838077][http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/s.gif] Love begins at home, and it is not how much we do... but how much love we put in that action. Mother Teresa See Johnny's Story Frontline Happy New Year![http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/im= g/552.jpg?a=3D1102386838077] This is the first year of the rest of your life. This is also the first day of the rest of your life. That's why it is so important to occupy the moment and achieve the things t= hat really matter. I am excited because I have finally achieved something that has been outsta= nding for many years. Best of all I achieved it on the last day of 2008. Ye= s sir, I am ready for 2009 in a big way. Finally I have done my Will. I am now ready to die. More importantly I am n= ow ready to live knowing that I am much better prepared to die. But honestl= y I really can't take all the credit for completing my will because my wife= helped me greatly. The saga of our story reads like something out of the Keystone Cops. My wif= e's friend urged her to get our wills done, even going so far as to send he= r a coupon from the supermarket, offering two do-it-yourself wills for the = price of one, over two years ago. When we moved office over 18 months ago w= e lost the all important paperwork. After promising ourselves all year to a= ttend to this important matter my wife finally came to my rescue and re-ord= ered the Will Kit a few weeks ago. As I said to a fe= male parliamentarian once, "I hate to admit it but the Fatherhood Foundatio= n is empowered by women." The few days we had off between Christmas and New Year gave us the window o= f opportunity and as a long time professional procrastinator I had no excus= e. Every father should have a will. Every mother should have one too. However,= most DIY Will Kits supply a 'his-and-hers' version. Wisdom says that your = will should mirror your wife's will so that if there is an accident involvi= ng both of you, the wills are consistent. One of the very important aspects about making a will is that a proper will= always makes a statement about who you will appoint as the guardian of you= r children should you and your spouse pass away at the same time. When you = think about the ramifications of not having this worked out, eg your childr= en becoming wards of the state or homeless etc, it is all the more reason t= o get this attended to ASAP. The importance of preparing a will was driven home to me in 2005 when our g= ood friend and founding Fatherhood Foundation Board Member Michael Baker di= ed. I had also worked with Michael on the board of the Praise Corroboree since 1996. Both Michael and I share= d a deep love and concern for the Aboriginal people of Australia and the tr= auma they had suffered since the beginning of white settlement. Michael Baker was a divorced father of six children and a grandfather to se= ven. His death was not entirely unexpected as he had suffered for many year= s with advanced emphysema. Michael was a fastidious businessman and bookkeeper but despite having succ= essfully stared death in the face for many years (many times his family and= I had gathered around his hospital bed and prayed him back from death's do= or) the family could not locate his will. The complications of this caused = his surviving family members unnecessary friction and extra legal costs, a = burden they could have done without. Fortunately for my family such a burden, coming from my untimely death, no = longer exists. However in considering the process of leaving your possessio= ns for your loved ones that you leave behind, you realize that money and po= ssessions are inconsequential in the broader scheme of things. The greatest thing that you can leave behind as a legacy for your children = is the thing that really matters. The only legacy that will stand the test of time is the Legacy of Love. Lovework - memorise the following: Appreciate every moment with your children. Don't wish their childhood away. One hundred years from now, it will not matter what kind of car you drove. or what kind of house you lived in, or how many books you wrote, or what your clothes looked like. But the world may be a little better because you were important in the life of a child. Yours for leaving a Legacy of Love Warwick Marsh PS. Next week I will share one of the most inspiring stories I have ever he= ard about the power of a father's love. This story has touched millions of = people. In the meantime have a look at the story of 'Johnny' in Thought for the Wee= k. You might like to forward it to a friend. Remember you can sign up a friend to our newsletter but you must make sure = you tell them first. Why don't you forward this week's newsletter, detailin= g your intention of subscribing them, so that they know what the Dads4Kids = Fatherhood Foundation weekly newsletter is like. Always point out that ther= e is an unsubscribe link at the end of the newsletter. You probably know lots of people who would like to receive some encourageme= nt and inspiration on the subject of fatherhood, family and marriage. Give = your friends a free subscription to the Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation wee= kly email newsletter. Give them a great start to the New Year. ____________________________________________________________________ Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison for 33 years. He is the grandfath= er of two children and father of five children, four boys and one girl, ran= ging in age from 28 years to 16 years. Warwick is a musician, songwriter, = producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himsel= f. Link of the Week Marley and Me Laughter [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/559.jpg?a= =3D1102386838077] A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed h= ome. He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed: 'Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at hom= e. I want her to know what I go through. So, please allow her body to switch with mine for a day. Amen!' God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish. The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman. He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate, Awakened the kids, Set out their school clothes, Fed them breakfast, Packed their lunches, Drove them to school, Came home and picked up the dry cleaning, Took it to the cleaners Went grocery shopping, Then drove home to put away the groceries, He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.[http://origin.ih.consta= ntcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/560.jpg?a=3D1102386838077] Then, it was already 01P.M. And he hurried to make the beds, Do the laundry, vacuum, Dust, And sweep and mop the kitchen floor. Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with them on= the way home. Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homework. Then, set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing. At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, breaded= the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper. After supper, He cleaned the kitchen, Ran the dishwasher, Folded laundry, Bathed the kids, And put them to bed. At 09 P.M . He was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he went to = bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get through wit= hout complaint. The next morning, he awoke and immediately knelt by the bed and said: - 'Lord, I don't know what I was thinking. I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day. Please, oh! Oh! Please, let us trade back. Amen!' The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied: 'My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to change = things back to the way they were. You'll just have to wait nine months, though. You got pregnant last night.' Grandfathers [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/553.jpg?a=3D1= 102386838077] Appreciate every moment with your children. Don't wish their childhood away. One hundred years from now, it will not matter what kind of car you drove. or what kind of house you lived in, or how many books you wrote, or what your clothes looked like. But the world may be a little better because you were important in the life of a child. [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/stock1/0f2c6t9a.jpg] Courtesy of the Fatherhood Foundation: PO Box 542 Unanderra NSW 2526 Ph: (02)4272 6677 Email: info@fatherhood.org.au Web: www.fatherhood.org.au Single Dads New Year Well Wishes & Challenges[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs0= 07/1101938345415/img/555.jpg?a=3D1102386838077] We wish all our Single Dad readers the very best for the New Year. In many cases men become single dads through the untimely death of their sp= ouse. We honour you for your courage and determination in raising your chil= dren on your own as a single parent in a society that is not as supportive = of single fathers as it should be. Be encouraged! The founder of Father's Day, Sonara Louise Smart Dodd, was raised by a sing= le father by the name of William Jackson Smart, a civil was veteran. Her story is inspirational in every way. Sonara's mother died in child birt= h when Sonara was sixteen years of age. William raised the newborn and five= other children as a brave single dad. He became the inspiration for Father= 's Day, which was first celebrated on his birthday in June. Unfortunately most single dads have been made single fathers through marria= ge breakup. This is a painful enough process without having to suffer the i= njustice of the Family Law Court and Child Support System. The relatively m= inor changes towards equality and a fairer process are in danger of being w= ound back by wall-to-wall anti-male governments. Only a few weeks ago I heard of a 74 year old Australian migrant, unable to= read or write, who is being prosecuted by the Child Support Agency. His ex= -wife has denied access to his children and this man has been saddled with = a deemed debt of $90,000 plus $90,000 of penalties. Although he is on the a= ged pension the Child Support Agency has employed a barrister and a solicit= or on behalf of the Australian government to pursue him for a debt he canno= t pay. The man was refused Legal Aid and was left to defend himself in a co= urt before a female judge. He admitted that he did not understand the many = questions on complicated case law fired at him by the government barrister = but the female judge did nothing to intervene on his behalf and then delibe= rately brought his hearing date forward instead of allowing for a proper de= lay when a solicitor-in-training, who was awaiting his final clearance, cou= ld make a proper defence on his behalf. This is a clear case on why the Family Court of Australia should be abolish= ed because the rot is not so much in the law as it is in the judiciary. Why= in the world would a judge rob a 74 year old man who could not read or wri= te the privilege of legal defence? If any other court in Australia did that= , they would be a laughing stock, but not the Family Court. Its secrecy pro= visions ensure that its judgements will never be held up for public scrutin= y. This case is so disturbing I have asked my friend John Flanagan to give = us the full story in next week's Single Dads. Let me reiterate: Have a Happy New Year! Warwick Marsh All You Need is Love Editor's note: It's the holiday season and we are always looking for 'good= ' movies. Marley and Me from the review below sounds 'pro marriage, pro com= mitment and very realistic'. Think we'll go see it. MARLEY AND ME [http://origin.ih.c= onstantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/554.jpg?a=3D1102386838077] I went to see 'Marley and Me'. I haven't read the book, but really enjoyed = the movie. The focus was actually about the couple's marriage and the dog w= as just the 'vehicle' to help the movie make its point. Marley was there with them as newlyweds, as they pursued careers, had child= ren, and relocated several times. It showed that, as in any marriage, there were times where the spouses were= both overwhelmed, upset, and frustrated with life's demands but each time = they affirmed their commitment to their marriage. The point made was that = this was a couple who was dedicated to sticking it out through good and bad= . The wife says at one point that she feels he(John Grogan, the husband an= d author of the book) can never just be happy where he is and with what he = has and that his restlessness concerns her, but he works that out within hi= mself ... apparently. By contrast, the husband has a friend who stays single and accomplishes a l= ot professionally and who keeps trying to use both John's dog and his kids = to meet women. The movie never conveys that John, the husband, wants to tr= ade places with the friend and his carefree single life. The contrast does= n't come across judgmental. It just makes it seem like the friend doesn't have roots and that his life = has a lot of emptiness while John has his family and a life with meaning. It was a really good family movie that I think you should see and recommend= to the list. Very pro marriage, very pro commitment, and very realistic. = Also, from what I read, John Grogan, the author, and his wife are, in real = life, happily married and he is very clear in interviews about how supporti= ve she has been of his writing and so on. Carmella Broome Special Feature [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/556.jpg?a=3D1= 102386838077]The Natural Family in an Unnatural World Perth, Western Australia October 18, 2008 By Allan Carlson (Continued from 2nd Movember issue) Third, we need to see THE NATURAL FAMILY AS THE SOURCE OF BOUNTIFUL JOY The most remarkable, and perhaps the most desired, human emotion is joy. W= hile happiness can in certain circumstances be something of a steady state = and where ecstasy is the nearly painful passion of a moment, joy delivers a= n intense and exultant experience that can last for hours, or days, before = it settles into an inner peace. . . . . . The possibility of happiness and joy rests, of course, within a large= r matrix of sacrifices, sorrows, foregone opportunities, and trials that al= so mark family life. Living together in families requires that persons con= front and overcome their own selfishness. All the same, it is only through= this task that the possibility of joy opens on the far side. Fourth, the natural family is also THE FOUNTAIN OF NEW LIFE Here, on this statement's reverse side, we meet the essential family crisis= of our day. In terms of population, the Western world may be dying. The = same goes with the once dynamic "Asian Tigers." America and Australia are = not far behind. I would offer up three ways to understand this change: The first is that of successful conspiracy. . . wealthy Americans - with n= ames including Gamble, Pillsbury, and Rockefeller - believed that war and p= overty were the result of unrestrained population growth. And they looked = with horror on the "baby booms" of the 1950's in the USA, Australia, and pa= rts of Europe, where the new suburbs filled up with three - and four - chil= d families. Second, Australian demographer John Caldwell emphasizes the role of mass st= ate education in generating fertility decline. Briefly explained, state ed= ucation authorities actively subvert parental rights and authority, substit= uting a state morality. Children learn that their futures lie with the mod= ern State rather than the pre-modern family. As Caldwell summarizes, "it..= .has yet to be [shown]...that any society can sustain stable high fertility= beyond two generations of mass [state] schooling."[1] A third way to view depopulation is through the value-revolution which swep= t the Western world after 1965, marked by a retreat from religious faith. .= . Put another way, secularization or the retreat from religion emerges as= a cause of contemporary fertility decline.[2] These observations so highlight the developments needed to reverse fertilit= y decline, namely: (1) building an intellectual and organizational infrastr= ucture that is forthrightly pro-natalist; (2) developing public policies th= at would support the mothers of young children in their homes; (3) restorin= g effective parental control over the education of their children; and (4) = launching a counter-revolution in values under the natural family banner. Finally, the natural family is THE BULWARK OF LIBERTY The terrible campaigns against marriage mounted by the Nazis and the Commun= ists, just as the assaults on marriage launched by left liberals and social= ists, reveal a common truth: The first targets of any oppressive, totalita= rian regime are marriage and family. Why? The Christian journalist and ap= ologist G.K. Chesterton - who has been properly frequently quoted today - e= xplains the reason in his powerful 1920 pamphlet The Superstition of Divorc= e: The ideal for which [the family] stands in the state is liberty. It stands= for liberty for the very simple reason...[that] it is the only...instituti= on that is at once necessary and voluntary. It is the only check on the st= ate that is bound to renew itself as eternally as the state, and more natur= ally than the state....This is the only way in which truth can ever find re= fuge from public persecution, and the good man survive the bad government.[= 3] Or, as the Chesterton argued in What's Wrong with the World: It may be said that this institution of the home is the one anarchist insti= tution. That is to say, it is older than law, and stands outside the State= .[4] Even under the worst of governments, however, families have found ways to s= urvive. During Nazi rule in Germany, for instance, the regime's propagandi= sts made much of the fact that the nation's marriage rate was rising. In f= act, there is good evidence suggesting that marriage had actually become an= anti-Nazi act. As historian Claudia Koontz concludes: "Germans who drove= the marriage rates upward may well have sought an escape from participatio= n in the Nazified public square."[5] Moreover, Dutch scholars have documented that the imposition of Communism o= n Poland after 1945 did not weaken the family system there. Instead, the o= ppressive Communist system actually increased family solidarity: We [found] that the importance of the family increased [under Communist rul= e], and that...the family increased its role as the cornerstone of society.= Political and social suppression can have unexpected positive effects, li= ke the strengthening of the family.[6] As Chesterton had predicted, the natural family-"the one anarchist institut= ion" - survived, and even triumphed over totalitarian Communism, one of its= great 20th Century foes. More broadly, persecution, disaster, even the fall of nations and civilizat= ions cannot destroy the familial character of humankind. "In the break-up = of the modern world," Chesterton observed, "the family will stand out stark= and strong as it did before the beginning of history; the only thing that = can really remain a loyalty, because it is also a liberty."[7] A VISION The future of our Western civilization lies in the hands of the young, thos= e born over the last four decades. Particularly in Europe, America, and Au= stralia-New Zealand, they have been the children of a troubled age, a time = of moral and social disorder. They were born into a culture dominated by s= elf-indulgence, abortion, and cynicism. To re-make the world, they need to= be inspired by a positive vision of the true natural order. In our book T= he Natural Family, Paul Mero and I offer one iteration of this vision. We envision a culture that understands the marriage of a woman to a man to = be the central aspiration of the young. This culture affirms marriage as t= he best path to health, security, and fulfillment. It affirms the home bui= lt on marriage to be the source of true political sovereignty. It also hol= ds the household framed by marriage to be the first economic unit, a place = rich in activity. This culture treasures private property in family hands = as the foundation of independence and liberty. It encourages young women t= o grow into wives, homemakers, and mothers. It encourages young men to gro= w into husbands, homebuilders, and fathers. This culture celebrates the ma= rital sexual union as the unique source of human life. These homes are ope= n to full quivers of children, the means of generational continuity and com= munity renewal. Joy is the product of persons enmeshed in vital bonds with spouses, childre= n, parents, and kin. A familial culture features a landscape of family hom= es, lawns, and gardens busy with useful tasks and ringing with the laughter= of many children. It regards parents as the primary educators of their ch= ildren. It opens homes to extended family members who need special care du= e to age or infirmity. This culture views neighborhoods, villages, and town= ships as the second locus of political sovereignty. It requires a freedom = of commerce that respects and serves family integrity, as well as a nation-= state that regards protection of the natural family as its first responsibi= lity.[8] Perhaps Christians can draw some courage from the fact that we, in a way, h= ave been at this point before. As I discussed in more detail this morning:= one thousand, seven hundred years ago, Christians witnessed the practices= of the pagan Romans, who were abandoning marriage and family for the pursu= it of individual pleasures. As Saint Ambrose observed at that time: [The] women [of Rome] are in a hurry to wean their children; If they be rich, they scorn to suckle them; Poor women expose their children [to die]; And if found, refuse to take them back; The rich, rather than see their fortune divided, Use murderous juices to kill the fetus within the womb; Men have not the affection of crows for their little ones. Those early Christians did not give in to despair. Instead, they went out = to build a culture around the natural family. They became an example of an= other, and better way to live. In this, the year of Our Lord 2008, the pagans are back, with their same ol= d culture of selfishness and death. Christians - and allies - are summoned= again to build a culture of life resting on the natural family. In his message for the World Day of Peace, given this past January 1, Pope = Benedict XVI summons us to this purpose. He states [quote]: "The natural f= amily, as an intimate communion of life and love, based on marriage between= a man and a woman, constitutes 'the primary place of "humanization" for th= e person and society' and a 'cradle of life and love.' The family is there= fore rightly defined as the first natural society, 'a divine institution th= at stands at the foundation of life of the human person as the prototype of= every social order.'" There is great strength and new opportunity in the "natural family" ideal. = As a sign of this, our foes are deeply frustrated by these two words joine= d together. Let us use them to build once again a better social order, a t= rue culture of the family, a model for those lost and searching, one in har= mony with our human nature, and one that will welcome and protect the child= ren to come. Due to space restrictions Allan's article has been printed in part over two= weeks. Please email info@fatherhood.org.au to requ= est a copy of the full article. _________________________ Allan Carlson is President of The Howard Center for Family, Religion & Soci= ety and International Secretary of The World Congress of Families. He also= currently serves as Visiting Distinguished Professor of Political Science = and History at Hillsdale College, in Michigan. ENDNOTES [1] John C. Caldwell, Theory of Fertility Decline (London and New York: A= cademic Press, 1982): 324. [2] Ron Lesthaeghe, "A Century of Demographic and Cultural Change in West= ern Europe," Population and Development Review 9 (1983): 411-35. [3] G.K. Chesterton, Collected Works: Volume IV: Family, Society, Politic= s (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 1987): 256. [4] Chesterton, Collected Works, IV, pp. 67-68. [5] Claudia Koonz, Mothers in the Fatherland: Women, the Family, and Nazi= Politics (New York: St. Martin's Press, 1987): 393. [6] H. Ruigrok, J. Dronkers, B. Mach, "Communism and the Decline of the F= amily: Resemblance between the occupational levels of Polish siblings from = different gender, generations, political background and family forms." Pap= er presented at the Seventh Social Science Study Day conference, April 11-1= 2, 1996, The University of Amsterdam. [7] Illustrated London News, June 17, 1933. [8] Adapted from: Allan C. Carlson and Paul T. Mero, The Natural Family: = A Manifesto (Dallas, TX: Spence, 2007): 12-13. News & Info Letters[http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/557.jp= g?a=3D1102386838077] Dear Fatherhood Foundation I am having issues with my ex who keeps threatening to not allow me to see = my kids, even after 7 months of me having them 6 nights a fortnight. She o= ccasionally, depending on her mood, decides to make things difficult for me= and it's very stressful. I need to make formal shared parenting arrangements that can't be changed a= t the drop of a hat by one person - where's the best place for me to start? Do you have a list of lawyers dealing with Family Law from the point of vie= w of the Father?? Or are you able to refer me to any organisations that ca= n help me work it out? Thank you Darren __________________________________ Dear Fatherhood Foundation Could you put the below letter from Julie in your weekly Dads4Kids Fatherho= od Foundation Newsletter. I am passing it around my network in the Family F= riendly Mens movement. Kind Regards Tony Miller Dear Everyone Firstly....happy new year!!! We are still plugging on our television show and are now working with a new= production company. For the new pilot they want to film me interviewing = individuals/couples about their experience with divorce and how they have c= oped/are coping/or would like to cope. I would really like to interview yo= u. What do you think? I also wondered if you know anyone who would be prepared to be interviewed,= or a couple who have been through it and have somehow managed to be on ami= cable terms, to discuss how hard the process was and how they managed to ac= hieve this. The other interview we would like to do is with a couple who may not be get= ting along, but would like to, and we could interview them and offer to pay= for the cost of a mediator/counsellor and film them before and after the c= ounselling to see how it helped. We are determined to make this show a reality, because it is just so needed= /necessary and there is nothing to watch on tv anyway. Regards, Julie Julie Singleton, Solicitors Suite 443, 311-315 Castlereagh Street Sydney NSW 2000 +61 2 9280 0200 ________________________________________________________________ SYDNEY MEN'S FESTIVAL JAN 2009 Sunday 11 to Sunday 18 Jan 2009 Venue: 'Yaraandoo', 28 Nollands Road Fiddletown, Arcadia (near Hornsby) For more details: http://www.sydneymensfestival.org.au _________________________________________________________________ Fathering Adventures 4-9 July 2009 'Fathering Adventures' operates out of the stunning beauty of Tropical Nort= h Queensland. Our next 5-night father-son adventure will be held from Satur= day afternoon, July 4th to Thursday morning, July 9th 2009. The minimum age= requirement for the 'sons' is 13 years, and there is no upper age limit. W= e are limiting these 5-night adventures to a maximum of 12 father & son pai= rs. A typical day features an exceptional full-day, professionally-guided o= utdoor adventure / activity e.g. white-water rafting down the Tully River, = snorkelling and glass-bottom boat viewing on the outer Great Barrier Reef, = dual sea kayaking between Mission Beach and Dunk Island, and hiking to the = summit of Mount Tyson. The outdoor adventures / activities selected cater f= or all fitness levels. A typical evening features a multimedia presentation= and small group interaction on topics such as 'Authentic Manhood versus Co= nventional Manhood', and 'The Four Marks of a Real Man', followed by time r= elaxing around the fire sharing stories of the day's adventures. Far more d= etail can be found at the website www.fatheringadventures.com.au . To apply for sponsorship, please email me at darren@fatheringadventures.com= .au giving a brief explanation o= f your current family, and financial situation, and why it would be benefic= ial to your son and your relationship with him, for 'Fathering Adventures' = to offer your family a sponsorship package. Please ensure sponsorship reque= sts are kept to just one page in length. All requests will be read and cons= idered. [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/551.jpg?a=3D= 1102386838077] Alternatively, if your financial situation is such that you or your busines= s are able to contribute to offering financial support to others through th= e 'Fathering Adventures' sponsorship fund, then please also contact me at d= arren@fatheringadventures.com.au = or phone: 07 47232941 ________________________________ News Links for Parents Baby Bonus means Test confusion could cut cash THOUSANDS of eligible families could miss out on the $5000 baby bonus as a = result of confusion over the new means test for the measure. Australian kids on holiday watch tv the most GENERATION Next is watching so much television during the school holidays t= hat their health is at serious risk, a new report has found. Parents warned after Net sex charge POLICE in Perth have charged a 30-year-old man with trying to seduce a chil= d over the internet. The Online Child Exploitation Squad alleges that on December 31 and January= 1 the man, from WA's wheatbelt district, used an online chat program to tr= y and meet the girl. Dad's Prayer [http://origin.ih.constantcontact.com/fs007/1101938345415/img/558.jpg?a=3D1= 102386838077]Dear God Help me realize that I am a mere mortal. One day I will die. Help me realize that the greatest inheritance I can give my children is not silver or gold but something far greater. You gave your love for this world by giving your Son. I can best give my love to my children by receiving your Son. When I do that, I enter into a relationship with you and receive your legacy of love for myself. Help me write my will before I die so I don't make it hard for my children when I go.[http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/stock1/3p6i2y9u.jpg] Help me know your will so I can pass it on to my children before I die. Help me give them a Legacy of Love that will always outlast silver or gold. Help Us! [http://img.constantcontact.com/ui/images1/s.gif]The Fatherhood Foundation = is a Harm Prevention Charity. Fatherlessness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of h= arm. The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence in f= athering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, pr= otective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and thei= r children's mother. If you would like to give financially to the Fatherhood Foundation Public F= und and receive tax deductibility: Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund (Name, address and amount details must be emailed for a receipt for tax ded= uctibility) Westpac Branch Wollongong DONATE ONLINE BSB: 032 695 A/C: 25-5558 Or mail cheque and address details to: PO Box 542 UNANDERRA NSW 2526 AUSTRALIA The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund is a public fund listed on the Regis= ter of Harm Prevention Charities under Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax = Assessment Act 1997. You have received the fathersonline.org newsletter because you have subscri= bed, or you have been subscribed by a friend. If you do not wish to receiv= e future emails, please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below. Forward email [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/safe_unsubscribe_logo.gif] This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au by info@fathersonline.org. Update Profile/Email Address | Instant removal with SafeUnsubscribe(tm) | Pri= vacy Policy. Email Marketing= by [http://img.constantcontact.com/letters/images/cc-logo-color-sm.gif] Fatherhood Foundation | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia --_000_1102386838077110193834541512118115172019scheduler_ Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
=09
3D"Dads4Kids
=09
=09 =09 =09 =09
 5th January 2009      = Inspiring Fathers Encouraging Families 
 

 

 
Legacy
of Love
=
Dear Brian,
Welcome to the Fatherhood Foundation newsletter and email information = service for Fathers and Families as we present a Legacy of Love
=09
In This Issue
Frontline...The first year of the rest of your life
Link...Marley & Me
Laughter..I want what she's got
Grandfathers...Appreciate every moment
Single Dads...Happy New Year
All You Need is Love..Wholesome viewing
Special Feature...The Natural Family
News & Info..New Year News
Dad's Prayer..Help me leave a legacy
Next Week&nb= sp;
A Father's= Love
 =09 =09
Join= our Mailing List!
 
Quick Links
=09
 Thought of the Week
3D"Family&= nbsp;
 Love begins at home,
and it is not how muc= h we do...
but how much love we put in that action.


Mother Teresa
 
See Johnny's Story=
Frontline
=
Happy New Year!3D"Family 
This is the first year of the rest of= your life.
This is also the first day of the rest of your life.
That's why it is so important to occupy the moment and achieve the things= that really matter.
 
I am excited because I have finally a= chieved something that has been outstanding for many years. Best of all I a= chieved it on the last day of 2008. Yes sir, I am ready for 2009 in a big w= ay.
 
Finally I have done my Will. I am now ready to die. Mo= re importantly I am now ready to live knowing that I am much better prepare= d to die. But honestly I really can't take all the credit for completing my= will because my wife helped me greatly.
 
The saga of our s= tory reads like something out of the Keystone Cops. My wife's friend urged = her to get our wills done, even going so far as to send her a coupon from t= he supermarket, offering two do-it-yourself wills for the price of one, ove= r two years ago. When we moved office over 18 months ago we lost the all im= portant paperwork. After promising ourselves all year to attend to this imp= ortant matter my wife finally came to my rescue and re-ordered the = Will Kit a few weeks ago. As I said to a female parliamentarian once, "= I hate to admit it but the Fatherhood Foundation is empowered by women."  
The few days we had off between Christmas and New Year gave= us the window of opportunity and as a long time professional procrastinato= r I had no excuse.
 
Every father should have a will. Every = mother should have one too. However, most DIY Will Kits supply a 'his-and-h= ers' version. Wisdom says that your will should mirror your wife's will so = that if there is an accident involving both of you, the wills are consisten= t.
 
One of the very important aspects about making a will i= s that a proper will always makes a statement about who you will appoint as= the guardian of your children should you and your spouse pass away at the = same time. When you think about the ramifications of not having this worked= out, eg your children becoming wards of the state or homeless etc, it is a= ll the more reason to get this attended to ASAP.
 
The impor= tance of preparing a will was driven home to me in 2005 when our good frien= d and founding Fatherhood Foundation Board Member Michael Baker died. I had= also worked with Michael on the board of the Pra= ise Corroboree since 1996. Both Michael and I shared a deep love and co= ncern for the Aboriginal people of Australia and the trauma they had suffer= ed since the beginning of white settlement.
 
Michael Baker= was a divorced father of six children and a grandfather to seven. His deat= h was not entirely unexpected as he had suffered for many years with advanc= ed emphysema.
 
Michael was a fastidious businessman and boo= kkeeper but despite having successfully stared death in the face for many y= ears (many times his family and I had gathered around his hospital bed and = prayed him back from death's door) the family could not locate his will. Th= e complications of this caused his surviving family members unnecessary fri= ction and extra legal costs, a burden they could have done without.
&n= bsp;
Fortunately for my family such a burden, coming from my untimely = death, no longer exists. However in considering the process of leaving your= possessions for your loved ones that you leave behind, you realize that mo= ney and possessions are inconsequential in the broader scheme of things. 
The greatest thing that you can leave behind as a legacy for= your children is the thing that really matters.
The only legacy that= will stand the test of time is the Legacy of Love.
 
Lovework - memorise the following:
 
Apprecia= te every moment with your children.
Don't wish their childhood away. 
One hundred years from now,
it will not matter
w= hat kind of car you drove.
or what kind of house you lived in,
or= how many books you wrote,
or what your clothes looked like.
&nbs= p;
But the world may be a little better
because you were importan= t
in the life of a child.
 
Yours for leaving a L= egacy of Love
Warwick Marsh
 
PS. Next week I will shar= e one of the most inspiring stories I have ever heard about the power of a = father's love. This story has touched millions of people.
 
= In the meantime have a look at the story of '= Johnny' in Thought for the Week. You might like to forward it to a frie= nd.
 
Remember you can sign up a friend = to our newsletter but you must make sure you tell them first. Why don't= you forward this week's newsletter, detailing your intention of subscribin= g them, so that they know what the Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation weekly n= ewsletter is like. Always point out that there is an unsubscribe link at th= e end of the newsletter.
 
You probably know lots of people = who would like to receive some encouragement and inspiration on the subject= of fatherhood, family and marriage. Give your friends a free subscription = to the Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation weekly email newsletter. Give them a= great start to the New Year.

__________________________________= __________________________________

Warwick Marsh  has = been married to Alison for 33 years. He is the grandfather of two= children and father of five children, four boys and one girl, ranging in a= ge from 28 years to 16 years.  Warwick is a musician, songwriter,= producer and public speaker who likes to think he can still laugh at himse= lf.
Link of the Week
 
Laughter
=

  3D"Man_Housework"
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife sta= yed home.
He wanted her to see what he went through so he prayed:
'Dear Lor= d:
I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays a= t home.
I want her to know what I go through.
So, please allow her body to switch with mine for a day.
Amen!'

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.=
The next morning, sure enough, the man awoke as a woman.
He arose, cooked breakfast for his mate,
Awakened the kids,
=
Set out their school clothes,
Fed them breakfast,
Packed their lunches,
Drove them to school,
Came home and picked up the dry cleaning,
Took it to the cleaners


Went grocery shopping,
<= /div>
Then drove home to put away the groceries,

He cleaned the cat's litter box and bathed the dog.3D"Messy
Then, it was already 01P.M.
And he hurried to make the beds,
Do the laundry, vacuum,
Dust,
And sweep and mop the kitchen floor.
Ran to the school to pick up the kids and got into an argument with th= em on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and got the kids organized to do their homewo= rk.
Then, set up the ironing board and watched TV while he did the ironing= .
At 4:30 he began peeling potatoes and washing vegetables for salad, br= eaded the pork chops and snapped fresh beans for supper.

After s= upper,
He cleaned the kitchen,
Ran the dishwasher,
Folded laundry,
Bathed the kids,
And put them to bed.
At 09 P.M .
He was exhausted and, though his daily chores weren't finished, he wen= t to bed where he was expected to make love, which he managed to get throug= h without complaint.

The next morning, he awoke and immediately = knelt by the bed and said: -
'Lord, I don't know what I was thinking.<= br />
I was so wrong to envy my wife's being able to stay home all day.
Please, oh! Oh! Please, let us trade back.
Amen!'

The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:
'My son, I feel you have learned your lesson and I will be happy to ch= ange things back to the way they were.
You'll just have to wait nine m= onths, though.

You got pregnant last night.'
Grandfathers
3D"Hydronet" 
Appreciate every moment w= ith your children.
Don't wish their childhood away.
 
O= ne hundred years from now,
it will not matter
what kind of car y= ou drove.
or what kind of house you lived in,
or how many books y= ou wrote,
or what your clothes looked like.
 
But the w= orld may be a little better
because you were important
in the li= fe of a child.
 
Courtesy of the Fatherhood Foundation:=20
 
PO Box 542  Unanderra  NSW  2526  Ph: = (02)4272 6677=20
  Email: info@fatherhood.org.au    
Single Dads
 New Year Well Wishes &= Challenges3D"Dad_Son_Smile"
 
We wish all o= ur Single Dad readers the very best for the New Year.
 
In m= any cases men become single dads through the untimely death of their spouse= . We honour you for your courage and determination in raising your children= on your own as a single parent in a society that is not as supportive of s= ingle fathers as it should be.
 
Be encouraged!
 = ;
The founder of Father's Day, Sonara Louise Smart Dodd, was raised by= a single father by the name of William Jackson Smart, a civil was veteran.=
 
Her story is inspirational in every way. Sonara's mother = died in child birth when Sonara was sixteen years of age. William raised th= e newborn and five other children as a brave single dad. He became the insp= iration for Father's Day, which was first celebrated on his birthday in Jun= e.
 
Unfortunately most single dads have been made single fa= thers through marriage breakup. This is a painful enough process without ha= ving to suffer the injustice of the Family Law Court and Child Support Syst= em. The relatively minor changes towards equality and a fairer process are = in danger of being wound back by wall-to-wall anti-male governments.
&= nbsp;
Only a few weeks ago I heard of a 74 year old Australian migrant= , unable to read or write, who is being prosecuted by the Child Support Age= ncy. His ex-wife has denied access to his children and this man has been sa= ddled with a deemed debt of $90,000 plus $90,000 of penalties. Although he = is on the aged pension the Child Support Agency has employed a barrister an= d a solicitor on behalf of the Australian government to pursue him for a de= bt he cannot pay. The man was refused Legal Aid and was left to defend hims= elf in a court before a female judge. He admitted that he did not understan= d the many questions on complicated case law fired at him by the government= barrister but the female judge did nothing to intervene on his behalf and = then deliberately brought his hearing date forward instead of allowing for = a proper delay when a solicitor-in-training, who was awaiting his final cle= arance, could make a proper defence on his behalf.
 
This i= s a clear case on why the Family Court of Australia should be abolished bec= ause the rot is not so much in the law as it is in the judiciary. Why in th= e world would a judge rob a 74 year old man who could not read or write the= privilege of legal defence? If any other court in Australia did that, they= would be a laughing stock, but not the Family Court. Its secrecy provision= s ensure that its judgements will never be held up for public scrutiny. Thi= s case is so disturbing I have asked my friend John Flanagan to give us the= full story in next week's Single Dads.
 
Let me reiterate:<= br />Have a Happy New Year!
 
Warwick Marsh
All You Nee= d is Love
 Editor'= s note: It's the holiday season and we are always looking for 'good' movies= . Marley and Me from the review below sounds 'pro marriage, pro commitment = and very realistic'. Think we'll go see it.
 
MARLEY AND ME  3D"Marley
 
I= went to see 'Marley and Me'. I haven't read the book, but really enjoyed t= he movie. The focus was actually about the couple's marriage and the dog wa= s just the 'vehicle' to help the movie make its point. 
 Marley was there with them as newlyweds, as they pursued careers, had c= hildren, and relocated several times.
 
It showed that, as i= n any marriage, there were times where the spouses were both overwhelmed, u= pset, and frustrated with life's demands but each time they affirmed their = commitment to their marriage.  The point made was that this was a coup= le who was dedicated to sticking it out through good and bad.  The wif= e says at one point that she feels he(John Grogan, the husband and author o= f the book) can never just be happy where he is and with what he has and th= at his restlessness concerns her, but he works that out within himself ... = apparently.   
 
By contrast, the husband h= as a friend who stays single and accomplishes a lot professionally and who = keeps trying to use both John's dog and his kids to meet women.  The m= ovie never conveys that John, the husband, wants to trade places with the f= riend and his carefree single life.  The contrast doesn't come across = judgmental. 
 
It just makes it seem like the friend d= oesn't have roots and that his life has a lot of emptiness while John has h= is family and a life with meaning.
 
It was a really good fa= mily movie that I think you should see and recommend to the list.  Ver= y pro marriage, very pro commitment, and very realistic. Also, from what I = read, John Grogan, the author, and his wife are, in real life, happily marr= ied and he is very clear in interviews about how supportive she has been of= his writing and so on.
 
Carmella Broome
=
=09

Special Feature

3D"NaturalThe Natural Family in an Unnatural World<= /font>
Perth, Western Australia
October 18, 2008
B= y Allan Carlson
 
(Continued from 2nd Movember issue) &= nbsp;    
 
Third, we need to see THE NATURAL FAMILY AS THE SOURCE OF BOUNTIFUL JOY
&= nbsp;        
The most remark= able, and perhaps the most desired, human emotion is joy.  While happi= ness can in certain circumstances be something of a steady state and where = ecstasy is the nearly painful passion of a moment, joy delivers an intense = and exultant experience that can last for hours, or days, before it settles= into an inner peace. . .
       &n= bsp; 
. . . The possibility of happiness and joy rests, of cours= e, within a larger matrix of sacrifices, sorrows, foregone opportunities, a= nd trials that also mark family life.  Living together in families req= uires that persons confront and overcome their own selfishness.  All t= he same, it is only through this task that the possibility of joy opens on = the far side. 
 
Fourth, the natural family is also THE FOUNTAIN OF NEW LIFE
Here, on this statement= 's reverse side, we meet the essential family crisis of our day.  In t= erms of population, the Western world may be dying.  The same goes wit= h the once dynamic "Asian Tigers."  America and Australia are not far = behind. 
          =
I would offer up three ways to understand this change:
 &nb= sp;       
The first is that of su= ccessful conspiracy.  . . wealthy Americans - with names including Gam= ble, Pillsbury, and Rockefeller - believed that war and poverty were the re= sult of unrestrained population growth.  And they looked with horror o= n the "baby booms" of the 1950's in the USA, Australia, and parts of Europe= , where the new suburbs filled up with three - and four - child families.         
Second, Au= stralian demographer John Caldwell emphasizes the role of mass state educat= ion in generating fertility decline.  Briefly explained, state educati= on authorities actively subvert parental rights and authority, substituting= a state morality.  Children learn that their futures lie with the mod= ern State rather than the pre-modern family.  As Caldwell summarizes, = "it...has yet to be [shown]...that any society can sustain stable high fert= ility beyond two generations of mass [state] schooling."[1]
 &nbs= p;       
A third way to view depo= pulation is through the value-revolution which swept the Western world afte= r 1965, marked by a retreat from religious faith. . .  Put another way= , secularization or the retreat from religion emerges as a cause of contemp= orary fertility decline.[2] 
      = ;   
These observations so highlight the developments = needed to reverse fertility decline, namely: (1) building an intellectual a= nd organizational infrastructure that is forthrightly pro-natalist; (2) dev= eloping public policies that would support the mothers of young children in= their homes; (3) restoring effective parental control over the education o= f their children; and (4) launching a counter-revolution in values under th= e natural family banner.
 
     &nb= sp;   
Finally, the natural family is THE B= ULWARK OF LIBERTY
      &nb= sp;  
The terrible campaigns against marriage mounted by th= e Nazis and the Communists, just as the assaults on marriage launched by le= ft liberals and socialists, reveal a common truth:  The first targets = of any oppressive, totalitarian regime are marriage and family.  Why?&= nbsp; The Christian journalist and apologist G.K. Chesterton - who has been= properly frequently quoted today - explains the reason in his powerful 192= 0 pamphlet The Superstition of Divorce:
&nbs= p;
The ideal for which [the family] stands in the state is liberty.&nb= sp; It stands for liberty for the very simple reason...[that] it is the onl= y...institution that is at once necessary and voluntary.  It is the on= ly check on the state that is bound to renew itself as eternally as the sta= te, and more naturally than the state....This is the only way in which trut= h can ever find refuge from public persecution, and the good man survive th= e bad government.[3]
 
Or, as the Chesterton argued in <= strong>What's Wrong with the World:
It may be said that = this institution of the home is the one anarchist institution.  That i= s to say, it is older than law, and stands outside the State.[4]
 = ;
Even under the worst of governments, however, families have found wa= ys to survive.  During Nazi rule in Germany, for instance, the regime'= s propagandists made much of the fact that the nation's marriage rate was r= ising.  In fact, there is good evidence suggesting that marriage had a= ctually become an anti-Nazi act.  As historian Claudia Koontz conclude= s:  "Germans who drove the marriage rates upward may well have sought = an escape from participation in the Nazified public square."[5]
 =         
Moreover, Dutch scho= lars have documented that the imposition of Communism on Poland after 1945 = did not weaken the family system there.  Instead, the oppressive Commu= nist system actually increased family solidarity:
We [found] that the = importance of the family increased [under Communist rule], and that...the f= amily increased its role as the cornerstone of society.  Political and= social suppression can have unexpected positive effects, like the strength= ening of the family.[6]
 
As Chesterton had predicted, the n= atural family-"the one anarchist institution" - survived, and even triumphe= d over totalitarian Communism, one of its great 20th Century foes.           
More broad= ly, persecution, disaster, even the fall of nations and civilizations canno= t destroy the familial character of humankind.  "In the break-up of th= e modern world," Chesterton observed, "the family will stand out stark and = strong as it did before the beginning of history; the only thing that can r= eally remain a loyalty, because it is also a liberty."[7]
 
=  
A VISION
    &= nbsp;    
The future of our Western civilization = lies in the hands of the young, those born over the last four decades. = ; Particularly in Europe, America, and Australia-New Zealand, they have bee= n the children of a troubled age, a time of moral and social disorder. = ; They were born into a culture dominated by self-indulgence, abortion, and= cynicism.  To re-make the world, they need to be inspired by a positi= ve vision of the true natural order.  In our book The Natu= ral Family, Paul Mero and I offer one iteration of this visio= n.
         
We env= ision a culture that understands the marriage of a woman to a man to be the= central aspiration of the young.  This culture affirms marriage as th= e best path to health, security, and fulfillment.  It affirms the home= built on marriage to be the source of true political sovereignty.  It= also holds the household framed by marriage to be the first economic unit,= a place rich in activity.  This culture treasures private property in= family hands as the foundation of independence and liberty.  It encou= rages young women to grow into wives, homemakers, and mothers.  It enc= ourages young men to grow into husbands, homebuilders, and fathers.  T= his culture celebrates the marital sexual union as the unique source of hum= an life.  These homes are open to full quivers of children, the means = of generational continuity and community renewal.
   &n= bsp;     
Joy is the product of persons enme= shed in vital bonds with spouses, children, parents, and kin.  A famil= ial culture features a landscape of family homes, lawns, and gardens busy w= ith useful tasks and ringing with the laughter of many children.  It r= egards parents as the primary educators of their children.  It opens h= omes to extended family members who need special care due to age or infirmi= ty. This culture views neighborhoods, villages, and townships as the second= locus of political sovereignty.  It requires a freedom of commerce th= at respects and serves family integrity, as well as a nation-state that reg= ards protection of the natural family as its first responsibility.[8]
=  
Perhaps Christians can draw some courage from the fact that we,= in a way, have been at this point before.  As I discussed in more det= ail this morning:  one thousand, seven hundred years ago, Christians w= itnessed the practices of the pagan Romans, who were abandoning marriage an= d family for the pursuit of individual pleasures.  As Saint Ambrose ob= served at that time:
[The] women [of Rome] are in a hurry to wean thei= r children;
If they be rich, they scorn to suckle them;
Poor wome= n expose their children [to die];
And if found, refuse to take them ba= ck;
The rich, rather than see their fortune divided,
Use murderou= s juices to kill the fetus within the womb;
Men have not the affection= of crows for their little ones.
      &= nbsp;  
Those early Christians did not give in to despair.&= nbsp; Instead, they went out to build a culture around the natural family.&= nbsp; They became an example of another, and better way to live. 
         
In this, the= year of Our Lord 2008, the pagans are back, with their same old culture of= selfishness and death.  Christians - and allies - are summoned again = to build a culture of life resting on the natural family.
  =        
In his message for the Wor= ld Day of Peace, given this past January 1, Pope Benedict XVI summons us to= this purpose.  He states [quote]: "The natural family, as an intimate= communion of life and love, based on marriage between a man and a woman, c= onstitutes 'the primary place of "humanization" for the person and society'= and a 'cradle of life and love.'  The family is therefore rightly def= ined as the first natural society, 'a divine institution that stands at the= foundation of life of the human person as the prototype of every social or= der.'"
         
Th= ere is great strength and new opportunity in the "natural family" ideal.&nb= sp; As a sign of this, our foes are deeply frustrated by these two words jo= ined together.  Let us use them to build once again a better social or= der, a true culture of the family, a model for those lost and searching, on= e in harmony with our human nature, and one that will welcome and protect t= he children to come.
 
Due to space restrictions Allan's art= icle has been printed in part over two weeks.
Please email info@fatherhood.org.au=  to request a copy of the full article.
 
____________= _____________
 
Allan Carlson is President of The Howard Cen= ter for Family, Religion & Society and International Secretary of The World= Congress of Families.  He also currently serves as Visiting Distingui= shed Professor of Political Science and History at Hillsdale College, in Mi= chigan.
 
ENDNOTES
 

[1]   John C. Caldwell, Theory of Fertility Decline (London = and New York: Academic Press, 1982): 324.
[2]   Ron Lesthaeghe, "A Century of Demographic and Cultural= Change in Western Europe," Population and Development Review 9 (1983): 411= -35.
[3]   G.K. Chesterton, Collected Works: Volume IV: Family, S= ociety, Politics (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 1987): 256.
[4]   Chesterton, Collected Works, IV, pp. 67-68.
[5]   Claudia Koonz, Mothers in the Fatherland: Women, the F= amily, and Nazi Politics  (New York: St. Martin's Press, 1987): 393.
[6]   H. Ruigrok, J. Dronkers, B. Mach, "Communism and the D= ecline of the Family: Resemblance between the occupational levels of Polish= siblings from different gender, generations, political background and fami= ly forms."  Paper presented at the Seventh Social Science Study Day co= nference, April 11-12, 1996, The University of Amsterdam.
[7]   Illustrated London News, June 17, 1933.
[8]   Adapted from: Allan C. Carlson and Paul T. Mero, The N= atural Family: A Manifesto (Dallas, TX: Spence, 2007): 12-13.
News & Info
=
  =   =20
Letters3D"Couple

Dear Fatherhood Foundation
 
I am having issues with my ex who keeps threatening to not al= low me to see my kids, even after 7 months of me having them 6 nights a for= tnight.  She occasionally, depending on her mood, decides to make thin= gs difficult for me and it's very stressful.
 
I need to mak= e formal shared parenting arrangements that can't be changed at the drop of= a hat by one person - where's the best place for me to start?
 <= br />Do you have a list of lawyers dealing with Family Law from the point o= f view of the Father??  Or are you able to refer me to any organisatio= ns that can help me work it out?
 
Thank you
Darren=20
__________________________________
 
Dear Fatherhood Foundation
Could you put the below letter from Ju= lie in your weekly Dads4Kids Fatherhood Foundation Newsletter. I am passing= it around my network in the Family Friendly Mens movement.
Kind Regar= ds
Tony Miller
 
Dear Everyone
 
Firstly= ....happy new year!!! 
 
We are still plugging on our = television show and are now working with a new production company.  &n= bsp;For the new pilot they want to film me interviewing individuals/couples= about their experience with divorce and how they have coped/are coping/or = would like to cope.  I would really like to interview you.  What = do you think? 
 
I also wondered if you know anyone wh= o would be prepared to be interviewed, or a couple who have been through it= and have somehow managed to be on amicable terms, to discuss how hard the = process was and how they managed to achieve this. 
 
T= he other interview we would like to do is with a couple who may not be gett= ing along, but would like to, and we could interview them and offer to pay = for the cost of a mediator/counsellor and film them before and after the co= unselling to see how it helped.
 
We are determined to make = this show a reality, because it is just so needed/necessary and there is no= thing to watch on tv anyway.
 
Regards,
 
Jul= ie
 
 
Julie Singleton, Solicitors
Suite 443,= 311-315 Castlereagh Street
Sydney  NSW  2000
+61 2 928= 0 0200
 
___________________________________________________= _____________

 

SYDNEY MEN'S FEST= IVAL
JAN 2009
 
Sund= ay 11 to Sunday 18 Jan 2009
Venue: 'Yaraandoo',
28 Nollands Road=
Fiddletown, Arcadia (near Hornsby)
For more details: http://www.sydneymensfestival.org.au  =  
_______________________________________________________________= __
 
 
Fathering Adventur= es 4-9 July 2009
 
'Fathering Adventures'&nb= sp;operates out of the stunning beauty of Tropical North Queensland. O= ur next 5-night father-son adventure will be held from Satur= day afternoon, July 4th to Thursday morning, July 9th 2009. The m= inimum age requirement for the 'sons' is 13 years, and there is n= o upper age limit. We are limiting these 5-night adventures to a maxim= um of 12 father & son pairs. A typical day features an exceptional full-day= , professionally-guided outdoor adventure / activity e.g. white-water rafti= ng down the Tully River, snorkelling and glass-bottom boat viewing on the o= uter Great Barrier Reef, dual sea kayaking between Mission Beach and Dunk I= sland, and hiking to the summit of Mount Tyson. The outdoor adventures / ac= tivities selected cater for all fitness levels. A typical evening features = a multimedia presentation and small group interaction on topics such as 'Au= thentic Manhood versus Conventional Manhood', and 'The Four Marks of a Real= Man', followed by time relaxing around the fire sharing stories of the day= 's adventures. Far more detail can be found at the website www.fatheringadventures.com.a= u .
 
To apply for sponsorship, please email me at darren@fa= theringadventures.com.au  giving a brief explanation of your curre= nt family, and financial situation, and why it would be beneficial to your = son and your relationship with him, for 'Fathering Adventures' to offer you= r family a sponsorship package. Please ensure sponsorship requests are kept= to just one page in length. All requests will be read and considered.
 3D"Father_son_rafting"
Alt= ernatively, if your financial situation is such that you or your business a= re able to contribute to offering financial support to others through the '= Fathering Adventures' sponsorship fund, then please also contact me at darren@f= atheringadventures.com.au or phone: 07 47232941
 
&= nbsp;
________________________________
 
News Links for Parents
 
 
THOUSANDS of eligible families could miss out on the $5000 baby bonus = as a result of confusion over the new means test for the measure.

Australian kids = on holiday watch tv the most 
 
GENERATION Next is watching so much television during the school holid= ays that their health is at serious risk, a new report has found.
Parents warned = after Net sex charge 
 
POLICE in Perth have charged a 30-year-old man with trying to seduce a= child over the internet.
The Online Child Exploitation Squad alleges that on December 31 and Ja= nuary 1 the man, from WA's wheatbelt district, used an online chat program = to try and meet the girl.

Dad's Prayer

3D"ManDe= ar God
 
Help me realize that I am a mere mortal.
One d= ay I will die.
Help me realize that the greatest inheritance
I ca= n give my children is not silver or gold
but something far greater.You gave your love for this world by=20
giving your Son.
I can best give my love to my children by receiv= ing your Son.
When I do that, I enter into a
relationship with yo= u
and receive your legacy of love for myself.
Help me write my wi= ll before I die
so I don't make it hard for my
children when I = go.
Help me know your w= ill
so I can pass it on to my children before I die.
Help me give= them a
Legacy of Love
that will always outlast silver or gold.&n= bsp;
=09
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Help Us!

3D"HelpUs"= The Fatherhood Foundation is a Harm Prevention Charity.
Fatherles= sness and inadequate fathering has been proven to be a source of harm.= The Fatherhood Foundation helps children by promoting excellence  in = fathering. Excellent fathers are in word and deed: responsible, involved, p= rotective, loving and committed to the well-being of their children and the= ir children's mother.

 

If you would like to give financially t= o the Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund and receive tax deductibility:

 

Fatherhood Found= ation Public Fund
(Name, address and amount details must be = emailed for a receipt for tax deductibility)

 Westpac Branch Wollongong      &nb= sp;            =   DONATE ONLINE

BSB: 032 695
A/C: 25-5558
 

Or mail cheque and address details to:<= br />PO Box 542
UNANDERRA  NSW&nbs= p; 2526
AUSTRALIA

 

The Fatherhood Foundation Public Fund&n= bsp; is a public fund listed on the Register of Harm Prevention Charities u= nder Subdivision 30_EA of the Income Tax Assessment Act 1997.=

 

You have received the fatherson= line.org newsletter because you have subscribed, or you have been = subscribed by a friend.  If you do not wish to receive future emails, = please click the UNSUBSCRIBE button below.

=09
=09
=09
3D"Safe
This email was sent to blane@uow.edu.au by in= fo@fathersonline.org.
Fatherhood Foundati= on | P.O. Box 542 | Unanderra | NSW | 2526 | Australia
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